Do you really need a particular day...???

Now friends before you go ahead and get judgmental, let me tell you that I am neither a "religious fundamentalist" nor a "rabid nationalist", who is opposed to each n every "western import" as principle. Rather on the contrary, I am  a normal person who happen to be walking hand in hand with changing times and never appreciate those FATWAS preaching about how the women should be kept confined within the fore walls, but yet I don't like the concept of Valentine's Day... I am not saying that I hate it but somehow I detest it and feel that there is no need to mark any particular day in 365 days to show our love n affection for someone we really love....

Now before you mark me as someone who is quite old or traditional in his thoughts about social values and morality of life allow me to explain why I detest the concept of Valentine's day.....

First of all I am not saying that you should not take time to show your love n affection for your spouse but do you really need a specific day to do so...??? Well, I think in no way you need any particular day to make the person feel special whom you love.... Shouldn't that just be a part of relation anyway...??? Because I personally believe that two human in relation, already love each other, otherwise there wouldn't be any relation.

It makes me sick when I see people running around proclaimimg their love and pleading their eternal allegiance to one another and I seriously feel that if someone truly care about you then you should hear it more often than once a year with heart shaped cardboard box....

Moreover I think that Valentine's day is created simply for the merchandising industry as a mechanism for separating us from our hard earned money...... The greeting card industry rakes in billions as crazy lovers all over the world queue up to buy those cheesy n pricey cards and moreover a card alone is not adequate enough to satisfy your loved one because you are expected to fork over for bigger and even more expensive n glittering gifts to prove your love for the recipient....

Now the interesting side of the Valentine's day story is that in my view it is one of the most sexist things because its always men(in most of the cases) who have to find some way for making this day a memorable one.... Its the men who have to come up with the grand gesture or the pricey glittering present  and all the women need to do is show up and look appreciative as all the attention is on them....Why it is so, when they spend entire year claiming about equality....??? :)

Sorry for the rant friends, but for me February 14th is just another day, doing all the things that I normally do.... reading the morning news paper over a hurried cup of tea, attending all routine work at the workplace and try getting home in time to spend some blissful moments with family and have dinner with them at home itself. Because I strongly believe that it should not be just one day in the whole year  when we show our love for our spouse rather it is something one should be doing all the year around, that too not with red roses, greeting cards, chocolates or expensive meals butttttttttttttt with kindness, understanding, patience and affection........

Moreover a heartfelt hug is always better than those glittering pricey gifts........isn't it....???

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"Divorce..... is this the only solution left"

" Even in worst condition, taking a decision to save the institution of marriage is the most noble, brave and wisest thing to do "

When two persons join together in marriage, separation and divorce is never something they think about.... Love for each other comes naturally and they both care for each other...... In fact both of them start enjoying each other's company and with each n every actions and gestures they always try to say each other....."I love you" and "I always think of you".....

And that is how they live their life together with a plan of how to raise the family and grow their children while fulfilling all those social responsibilities....

But unfortunately, its not the same for every couple out there and you can find many couples whose marriage end up heading down the wrong path not too long after the honeymoon is over. Instead of learning how to sacrifice one's need for the sake of matrimonial bliss, they realize that marriage requires giving up some of the things they treasure and over a period of time there is some resentment built up between them.....As the days passes the communication between the two starts slowing down and soon they start realizing that they are not made for each other. 

As a result arguments start and all kind of horrible and dirty words start coming out of their mouth and slowly(without even knowing) they start heading towards a nasty divorce.....Finally a day comes when both of them or any one of them starts talking about seeking divorce :(

I do realize that there can be many reasons why they want to divorce their spouse and only the people in those marriages know what exactly the problem is or what exactly wrong happened in their specific circumstances, but I often think that "how could two people who were in love few days back, end up resenting and in some cases hating each other......."

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( PS: This post is the result of some unfortunate happenings with a couple known to me and both of them are very dear to me...i just wish n pray that things may get better in their future life )

Smily Saturday......1 :)

So  what, if there is no kingdom.... ;)

Have a great weekend friends :)

Sex Sells....

Looking at the title of this post, some of you might be thinking that what happened to this man who has been always writing about dry and boring subjects, is talking about SEX here....so let me make it clear that even today I am not going to write erotic stories or how to win your man or woman during the period because I personally believe that there is no bookish way to follow and win your loved one during the process but it all depends upon individuals and the mutual relation of the couples.....

Anyways, coming on to the subject..... I have been a regular reader of couple of leading political and current affairs magazines, but while going through one of the recent issue of such magazine, I thought like reading DEBONAIR  or something similar to that. There were full pages of Condoms advertisements and rest of the pages were carrying a survey report based on sexual life and behavior of today's India......

Now just to mention some of the survey results here.......

i :- 48% husbands say their ideal partner is not their wife.....

ii :- 55% men say there is more infidelity because of more women in the work place....

iii :- For 55% men their first sexual partner was other than their wife....

iv :- 24% are open to one night stand....

v :- 27% parents believe that their child is sexually active and above that 73% of them have accepted it and kept quite....

Now when I start looking into my surrounding and the people whom I know since decades, most of the couple look like an ideal match for each other, so if the survey is right then are these thousands of couple simply pretending to be ideal......well I don't think its possible to do so for decades....Do you think so....???

Now if infidelity is more because of more working women then I suggest these survey people to go to rural India and feel the pulse of the nation, I am sure    this    report will be proved wrong and it does not have to do anything with women at work place or not....

Similarly survey report claims that 24% women are ready for one night stand, well I don't know who these 24% women are because I am desperately looking for one and could not find any.... may be I am too old now......

Now the 73% of the total 23% parents are reported to be keeping quite and accepting that let their chidren be active sexually....now, do you all think that these many of Indian parents are that modern...and how many of you parents out here will accept it quietly.....if you ask me then "I CAN'T".... may be I am too orthodox or too old fashioned.....

Not only this, the learned editor of this premier magazine claims that "This survey is the most trusted indication of how Indian men and women pursue the intimate pleasure of life and it brings the larger story of Indian's private life".....

Now, i just like to ask this learned editor that "what useful purpose does it serve to conduct a sex survey in which you go to Metros and pick up just 5365 people and come up with a report claiming it to be India's picture as a whole????

Don't you think that these bogus surveys are bound to encourage our youth to give up their principles and go mad behind sexual pleasure????

How do you think that a mere 5365 respondents from metros are to stand statistically valid across the nation????

Well, i can understand that Sex sells and each one of you is determined to out do others with such issues and your sale graph might have gone up after this, butttttttt did you ever thought(even for a second) that based on such bogus reports, our youths are bound to think that there are good chances of getting involved in sexual pleasure in every city and one has to do only is take few chance.....???

Moreover while going through your report I felt that you seem to think that there is no holiness, moral character, respect for marriage n sex left now in society  and all of us are animals not humans anymore......

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Surviving Winter.....

Hello friends....

All of you living in Northern or Eastern part of India, very well be knowing that how the temperature is falling every minute in these part of India.....Well, the mercury level is dropping down every minute like the morality falls in our day-to-day life.... :(

Frankly speaking, since last couple of days, instead of living my life out of the comfort of my warm blanket, i am seriously thinking about going into hibernation. Butttttttttttttttttt for some one like me(a middle class Indian) earning bread n butter is perhaps much more important then thinking about those comfort of  life.......

I remember, during my childhood my mother would heat the water, give me a bath, wipe me and wrap me in a Razai, making it sure that I was ready to fight every minute falling mercury level. Even I used to have my dinner form her hands while hiding myself totally inside that Razai....Actually back then winter did not seem as harsh as it seems now....THANK YOU  MOM :)

But now, may be because of AXE EFFECT( AGE EFFECT actually), this lowering mercury level making it difficult for me to live a normal life.....

Every night before going into sleep, I ask myself  "Should I wake up early in the morning and go for a walk or stay back in the comfort of my warm blanket for another two hours.....???"

While having my morning tea, instead of concentrating on the newspaper in my hand, I keep on thinking "Should I take bath or not...???"  And if I am not taking bath "should i spend some time inside the bathroom and come out after sprinkling some water into my hair so that others don't come to know that i didn't take bath....."

Again in the evening after coming back from workplace, I am in dilemma  "Should I wash my face or not...???"    If not,  "should I stay for a while inside the bathroom keeping the tap open and pretend to be fresh when I come out.....???"

Well, you might be smiling now on my cowardliness but for me taking these decisions are not that easy and that makes the winter even more bitter for me....... :(

Buttttttttttt after all these hardships of winter,  out of all the weathers, I like Winter most because....

"Surviving Winter together brings the couple closer"....isn't it....???

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Life goes on.....

We all know that life is full of events....Sometimes they are good and at times bad too......

Events happen in every body's life and with every event and happening there comes emotion attached with it. Indeed there is a lesson too for us in every thing that happens in our day-to-day life.

As you all know that just recently I had to go through a situation which I never thought of and so was never mentally prepared for it. Even when I shared that with all of you here at my blog, I was not sure what the end result will be. But now after about more than a month, I firmly believe that God is always there to take care of all of us and whatever it is, will be the best for my family and myself(Insha Allah).

I may not get all what I lost but hopefully I will be able to have again what I need because I have a feeling that the universe wants us to make  happy and it is certainly going to give what one need even if it may not give what one want.......

And this is how our life goes perhaps.........

"SOMETHING  TO TELL - SOMETHING  TO LEARN"

At times life does look like a game board.......... 

"WE   WIN SOME - WE  LOOSE  SOME"

People changes and things too go wrong, butttttttttt.......

"LIFE  GOES  ON"

In fact its like a movie to watch while smiling through tear filled eyes......

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PS:  Thanks a lot friends for all that moral n emotional support you gave during this tough period of mine....it does mean a lot to me and my family.......
i will be visiting all ur blog space one by one....i know its a long break this time but will try to catch up with all of you.....Thanks again... :)

.........:(

जाने कैसी साज़िश  हुई 

(Jaane kaisi saazish hui)

मेरा घर मिट्टी का था 

(Meraa ghar mitti ka tha)

मेरे  ही  घर  बारिश  हुई  

(Mere hi ghar baarish hui)

 :(    :(     :(

Hello friends, going through very tough moments.....About two weeks back there was a theft case in my home and i lost every thing.....lodged an FIR, tried hard with all the social and administrative contacts i had but nothing seems to be working and the efficient police force blaming me that why did i left my house unmanned for one day and asking me to name the culprit, the investigating officer advised me yesterday to forget about the incident and warned me not to leave the home unmanned next time....... i know, i am one bloody fool who left my home unmanned for one day and if at all i knew the culprit i would not have waited for the police to act, rather i would have kicked him on his ass and taken care of every thing that was needed.......but unfortunately its not so and forgetting about all those things that i earned in my twenty years of service period is not so easy for me......

Anyways, just trying to start life again...need your wishes n blessings......